I recently found the first post I wrote when starting this blog. I thought I’d share it below. My reasons for getting back to a daily practice of self-reflection most definitely still include (but are not limited to) the words below. Enjoy and Happy Holidays!

-Justino

The reason I began this blog is that as a working class Afrolatino choosing to pursue graduate study, I do not have much in the way of a peer group ( the small handful I do  have, you are loved, appreciated and respected!).   Also, at the City College of New York where I am finishing my bachelors there aren’t many people applying to doctoral programs. Out of the number who are, only a small percentage are people of color. The insecurities (academic or otherwise…) that one faces throughout this process are intensified as a result of dynamics related to class, race, and gender opression. Often we (people of color, women, working & oppressed people) doubt ourselves and do not feel we are capable enough or deserve to succeed in. this is especially true if we happen to make it to Academia. This is  not the fault of us individually or collectively but is due to our existence in a society  we that does not fail to remind us of our “supposed” inferiority through the various material and cultural forms at its disposal.  Those who squeeze through the small crack in the door that exists to perpetuate the myth of American meritocracy face another set of dangers. Every step of academic progress comes the possibility of further alienation from your friends, family, former peers, and possibly even culture. This blog is my reminder that despite this process being one that is profoundly atomizing and difficult, I am not alone in going through this. Many of other aspiring future academics of color I know are making their way through this wilderness called  North American academia and confront similar obstacles on daily basis. It is my hope that by sharing my experience (on this site more as a record as my main focus is in building community in the real world!) we might actually have a chance of both getting into and possibly even surviving graduate school. I hope to build some amazing relationships and learn as much as I can and about myself in the process. Through it all I will do my best not to forget myself by staying true to the experiences and people that have made me me who I am today. Saludos y suerte migente!

Hello All,

My name is Justino and I’m a 26 year old Nuyorican going in my senior year at the City College of New York. My major is History with a concentration in Latin American and Caribbean history (with anti war and immigrant rights activism fit in for good measure!). I’m in the process of applying to Grad History programs strong in modern Latin American History.

My major interests are Contemporary Latin American labor and social movements in the era of Neoliberalism and their ability to struggle against forms of power on a local and global level. I have spent the last two summers in Bolivia learning more about the history if its social movements. While living in several other Latin American countries (Argentina and Brazil) I was given the opportunity to work with individuals and organizations to whom I am forever indebted for the lessons they imparted in our time together.

“I think the other reason, and perhaps the most important reason I am throwing these suggestions out to you tonight, is that in this country, every black man born in this country, until this present moment is born into country, which assures him, in as many ways as it can find, that he is not worth the dirt he walks on. Every negro boy and every negro girl born in this country, until this very moment undergoes the agony of trying to find in the body politic, in the body social, outside himself or herself some image of himself of herself which is not demeaning. Now, many indeed have survived, and at an incalculable cost. Many more have perished and are perishing every day. If you tell a child, and do your best to prove to the child that he is not worth life, it is entirely possible that sooner or later the child begins to believe it.”

- James Baldwin (June, 1963)

Arsenio Rodriguez & the Afro-Cuban All Stars- “El Elemento del Bronx”